i'll make this post quick and painful. it sucks to the core after receiving this type of results. i mean i know everyone single freaking one did dam badly for prelim 1 but i freakingly disappointed everyone, myself, teachers and especially my parents.
imagine having a sister with 8 distinctions for o' levels with a 6pointer score. of course they'll compare u whenever they can. everything just sucks. is it that i dun understand the topic at all of is it that i didnt really study. well who knows, but me. but i dun really know. all i can rely upon is u, i hope. please give me stength, eventhough u are busy. thursday yipee ;D

SHIRLYNN, this is my ORIGINAL watch ;D


well, as we all know. sheeps are very gentle creatures created by God to serve with a purpose: to produce methane gas and also help with the eco-system. this is totally different from what the best movie 'black sheep' is talking about. this "freakingly awesome" movie talks about sheeps as super duper violent and filthy creatures who freakingly farts everywhere and also bites off people. its an M18 show so i guess u can imagine. sheeps infect people with a virus that it'll turn the person into a sheep. this is why, my friend junkai here, loves sheeps now. they are like his brothers as weell. if u really have the time, borrow my IC and watch it. you'll baaaadly enjoy. well awesome. can i have mutton instead of sheepchop? ;D

well today was an average day. studied hard but dozed off chemistry class lol. had headache in the afternoon which quickly went away with a dose of JUNKAI and causeway point. speaking of JUNKAI, that IDIOT dropped my black pen writting on my shirt. awesome, u are disastrous. lol. then, i collected what i needed to collect at causeway. i was so freaking disappointed with the item. i just dun wanna talk abt it. haix, i feel so blah blah blah. LOL. going to mug now. hahaha. enjoy ;D

PHRASE OF THE DAY:Sheeps are gentle and not violent as what junkai portrays.

LET ME TREAT U GUYS TO A SONG LYICS ABOUT SHEEPS, enjoy JUNKAI ;D

Baa, baa, black sheep,
Have you any wool?
Yes sir, yes sir,
Three bags full.

One for the master,
One for the dame,
And one for the little boy
Who lives down the lane.

Baa, baa, black sheep,
Have you any wool?
Yes sir, yes sir,
Three bags full.

what's happiness? often u ask urself, is being happy always a good thing. well, no. sometimes u become happy but you may not know that your happiness has caused others to be sad. this is an inevitable factor that always happen. well to most people, happiness is a feeling that everyone encounters that makes someone feel good that he/she expresses it through smiling. well, its not quite like that for me. happiness to me is seeing someone smile because of me. i feel happy when i make someone else feel happy. i guess, their happiness is contagious to me. i feel extremely happy when that person i made happy smiles or gives me a pat on the back saying 'thanks a lot dude'. it really lightens up my day, knowing that i made someone happy. one example was that i gave my sit to this very old chinese lady and she gave me a very pretty smile saying 'xie xie'. this made me super duper happy. well, i guess u are saying that i'm kinda weird, well, YES!

days getting better. feeling so much better, after helping solve your problem. i felt like i could fly. yet again, i was wrong. well i told u my problem already. and i feel so shitty about it. i can't even celebrate for helping u solve your problems. its not ur fault. i did it in my own freewill, dun feel guilty. just be there for me and ill be extremely happy. today, finally meeting u after one full week of chaos and misery; it was the first of the week i felt so happy, so free. well thank you. as usual, went to church. i bought so much food that we could have a picnic. and we did, but at cineleisure kopitiam. LOL. and we freaking saw this group of freaking 4 gays. omg! one really had boobs. it totally made my jaw open wide. one of them gave me a freakingly disgusting wink. hun, remember i was laughing on the way to mrt, i saw the freaking gay that blinked at me. lol. im gonna have nightmares. well, after updating, im gonna freaking mug chem like crazy. i'm missing u already. lalalla. CUPCAKES! hope u enjoyed the $16 bucks food i gave you ;D

Phrase of the day: True happiness is making others feel happy.


Well guys, let me treat u to a happy song lyrics that i wish for us to be.

"Happy Together" - Simple Plan Punkrock version. ENJOY ;D

Imagine me and you, I do
I think about you day and night, it's only right
To think about the girl you love and hold her tight
So happy together

If I should call you up, invest a dime
And you say you belong to me and ease my mind
Imagine how the world could be, so very fine
So happy together

I can't see me lovin' nobody but you
For all my life
When you're with me, baby the skies will be blue
For all my life

Me and you and you and me
No matter how they toss the dice, it has to be
The only one for me is you, and you for me
So happy together

If I should call you up, invest a dime (Call you up)
And you say you belong to me and ease my mind (Ease my mind)
Imagine how the world could be, so very fine (Very fine)
So happy together (together)

I can't see me lovin' nobody but you
For all my life
When you're with me, baby the skies will be blue
For all my life [x2]

About my life (Yeah!)

Call you up
Ease my mind, Ease my mind, Ease my mind!

I can't see me lovin' nobody but you
For all my life
When you're with me, baby the skies will be blue
For all my life [x2]

Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba

So happy together (Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba)
So happy together (Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba)
So how is the weather (Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba)
So happy together (Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba)

HAPPY 4th birthday DAENA!! - damn cute kid!

hope. finally, i see a sign of hope. lots of progress was done today. well, we'll talk about that later. woke up early today, i fought with mom early morning, which i don't wanna go in details. met junkai then went with him to bunk. we reach there at about 11:30. we were supposed to meet regina at 12 there. but instead she came at 1pm. idiot. there, i talked to vanida and settled things out peacefully. surprisingly it went quick and done with. nic, kc, mark, jk, GSM and i went to eat first then played lan. we played for like 3 hours. after, we felt dizzy like crazy. we went to the cathay and plaza singapura to 'jalan-jalan'. then, me and GSM saw mdm lee, principal eating with a bald guy in this shop that's like delifrance. LOL. we were like, 'mdm lee!' then we ran away. hahahahaha. well i guess me and sunrise is back to normal. i'm really glad.

well, what is hope. hope is actually a feeling that people feel when they desire for something or is willing something that they truly want to happen. hopes don't usually happen unless u do something about it. hopes are fulfilled 70% of the time when u do something about it. well i did, and it worked out for me. i hoped to solve her problems and i did something, which was talk it out and it worked. my hope was fulfilled due to the something i did. today, i learned something. i realised that what dar said to me was totally true. she said you feel 70% happier when u solve a problem. well, this is totally true. i feel 70% happier now. i'm on the road to recovery. hopefully, obstacles coming wouldn't be so hurting. hehehe. and i'm freaking missing you. blah blah blah. LOL. ;D

PHRASE OF THE DAY:Solving problems makes u 70% happier ;D

REPLIES!

QIAN WEN: lol. hahaha u are not the real qianwen lol. its either, junkai or kc or nicol LOL!

dawn <33: dar! lol. hello! hopefully things will clear out ;D

aznita: obviously! hahah all thanks to HAZIQ and of course you. ;D, and of course zainal that botak LOL! ;D


well, let me treat u to another song about hope ;D ENJOY!

"Vindicated"

Hope dangles on a string
Like slow spinning redemption
Winding in and winding out
The shine of it has caught my eye

And roped me in
So mesmerizing, so hypnotizing
I am captivated

[Chorus]
I am Vindicated
I am selfish
I am wrong
I am right
I swear I'm right
I swear I knew it all along

And I am flawed
But I am cleaning up so well
I am seeing in me now the things you swore you saw yourself

So clear
Like the diamond in your ring
Cut to mirror your intentions
Oversized and overwhelmed
The shine of which has caught my eye
And rendered me so isolated, so motivated
I am certain now that

[Chorus]

So turn
Up the corners of your lips
Part them and feel my finger tips
Trace the moment, fall forever
Defense is paper thin
Just one touch and I'd be in
Too deep now to ever swim against the current
So let me slip away [3x]
So let me slip against the current
So let me slip away [4x]

[Chorus]

Slight hope
It dangles on a string
Like slow spinning redemption..

HAPPY BDAE MOM AND REGINA! ;D lol. 47 and 17 respectively LOL.
well, today, was kinda awesome. i think i recovering. ;D
good news for those affected by my EMO-ing. hehehe.
my day started like as usual. physics was kinda alrighty. we did some exercises and went through the exercise he gave us. then as usual, mr ong couldnt resist the URGE to tell his jokes. we laughed a few times. anyways we enjoy his teachings and stuff. then english. for the first time in my whole 5-years in kranji, this is one of the first few times i enjoyed english. why? i bet u are asking urself that. well, its cause english today, had mcdonalds beside it. LOL. bet u don't understand. LOL. what i'm saying is, ms lim, bought mcdonalds breakfast for thos who got 14 and above for her test and i got 14. LOL. lucky eh?
then, we had two whole free period for history as ms ong had to go down for the humanities challenge or whatsoever. had fun chatting with the dance girls taking malay all the way about dunno one poem or something, i actually enjoyed it.

well, i guess you are wondering why my title for this post is like that. well, let me explain. after school, i went home straight cause i was super tired and took a 2hr nap. then, nicholas and kengchun went over to my house to watch a very freaky thailand movie called 'art of the devil II'. we actually enjoyed it, accompanied with RUFFLESpotato chips. weee! it was kinda scary with all its gore which totally explains the movie name. in philippines, curses happens quite frequently. once when i was like about 3 or so. my aunt got cursed. the story goes like this, she was on a jeep from the market. the jeep was crowded with many people as it was a sunday. unknowingly, my aunt stepped on a person's foot. she didnt say sorry cause she didnt really know. a day later, she found a wound on her foot. using medications and all, it healed. but after that, it kept on coming back. after 3 months, it was still there. she went to see a doctor and he said that it was normal. another 3months later, it was still there. my grandma decided to take her to a 'holy man'. the holy man saw this and told them that it was a curse. he prayed and chanted. then, the person who cursed my aunt, suddenly took over my aunt's body. the holy man threatened the person who cursed my aunt. the curse-er got scared and decided to let go and stopped the curse. well, it is completely up to u, whether u believe it or not. but it really happened. the only reason i remembered this as we watched a show about curses and voodoos. the whole main point of this is that do not mistreat others and also do unto them what u want them to do unto you. my mother said that once u curse someone, u will go straight to hell. this is because, cursing someone is an act of the devil. once u curse someone, u are actually being possessed by it. morale of the story, forgive and forget!

just wanna end this post by saying that i really really miss you. one whole freaking week full of madness and stuff is driving me crazy. anyways, i tried to do something. hoped that it worked. hope from now on, everything would be peaceful and stuff. no more problems. anyways, as u said, 'obstacles keeps us going, hun'. agreeable ;D

Replies!

Kyria: hehehe, find out yourself and ofcourse, anything with me in it will look sweet!! and also, when i'm emo, i write deep things, which are usually my deep thoughts and all. glad to here it actually makes u reflect. well, thats my purpose ;D

black sheep: today i forgot to kill you. i'll kill u tomorrow at PC BUNK.

shermaine&sheilina: linked! ;D

let me treat u guys to another song about my promise.

"Promise"

What would you say if I asked you not to go
To forget everyone, forget everything and start over with me
Would you take my hand and never let me go
Promise me you'll never let me go

And now the stars aren't out tonight,
But neither are we to look up at them
Why does hello feel like goodbye?
These memories can't replace,
These wishes I wished and dreams I chased
Take this broken heart and make it right

I feel like I lost everything when you're gone
Left remembering what it's like to have you here with me
I thought you should know,
You're not making this easy

I never thought I'd be the one to say
Please don't, well please don't leave me

I feel like I lost everything when you're gone
Left remembering what it's like to have you here with me
I thought you should know,
You're not making this easy

You're not making this easy (easy, easy, easy...)

Take my hand and never let me go,
Take my hand and never let me go,
Promise me...
You'll never let go
You'll never let go
You'll never let go
You'll never let go
Make this last forever

I feel like I lost everything when you're gone
Left remembering what it's like to have you here with me
I thought you should know,
You're not making this easy

You're not making this easy
You're not making this easy
You're not making this easy
You're not making this easy

I'll fall asleep tonight, 'cause that brings me closer to you

have u ever wondered why people hate violence? cause, there is this thing called 'peace'. only cowards use violence as a means of resolving their problems. that is probably why japan fell in their conquest to caprturing other countries. they used this thing called militarism. which actually equals to 'violence'. so, why is there violence. violence, is actually created by satan purposely so that humans will fight, riot and do much more sins so as to oppose the Gods. therefore, people who are violent are actually influenced by satan. violence is totally opposite to civilised.

my day was so shitty. have not slept for like 1 day. thinking. deep thoughts, racing through my mind. restless yet tired. sleepy, but unable to sleep. why is this happening to me? God never gives anyone obstacles that is too difficult for a person to overcome. God only gives decisions. u have the decision to choose which path u are going to take to solve that problem. God never insists on violence. as what is said, love those who hate u. significantly, if u love someone who hates you, they'll learn to love you and they'll know you are for peace. if not, try ignoring them. my mother always says, ignore those who hate u cause they'll get tired of hating u, they'll end up loving u. well i guess its true. experienced it before.

treat people as u want them to treat you. treat people with love, if u want them to treat u the same way. KARMA, a very very strong and a comprehensive word with a deep meaning. in other words, using simple english, it represents a phrase called, 'what goes around, comes around'. it basically means that if u do good to others, good will come back twice. if u do bad to others, bad will come back to u, harder. in other words, if u put more oil in the car, as stated below, the better the car will run, the more efficient the journey will be. think about all this and reflect.

studies, sucks. i failed 2 subjects, maths and science. in my whole chemistry class, out of like 40+ people, only 7 passes. great isnt it. and our freaking msg is 7point something. crazy. mom understood, she motivated me even more. Care&love. show it more, cause u don't know when that person is leaving earth for good. tell him/her all the things u want him/her to know so that u won't feel any regret or a sense of something missing when he/she leaves. well, i guess my main point today is just violence sucks, solve problems peacefully for everyone's betterness. cause, ur gonna end up feeling regret and ur conscience is going to kill u after beating the person up. on the whole, i love u more than anything in the world, thats why i was angry at u hurting urself. i felt hurt. i'm angry at u cause i care for u. its all for ur good. my intentions for u are all for ur betterness and for ur good. nevertheless, don't hurt urself anymore. cause i can't sleep peacefully with u having a problem which i cant do anything to resolve.

Phrase of the day: Voilence, is never the key. It's satan's secret weapon



i'll treat u guys to another song about violence in a relationship, enjoy.



"Face Down"

Hey, girl, you know you drive me crazy
one look puts the rhythm in my hand.
Still I'll never understand why you hang around
I see what's going down.

Cover up with makeup in the mirror
tell yourself, it's never gonna happen again
you cry alone and then he swears he loves you.

Do you feel like a man when you push her around?
Do you feel better now as she falls to the ground?
Well I'll tell you my friend, one day this world's going to end
as your lies crumble down, a new life she has found.

A pebble in the water makes a ripple effect
every action in this world will bear a consequence
If you wade around forever, you will surely drown
I see what's going down.

I see the way you go and say you're right again,
say you're right again
heed my lecture

Do you feel like a man when you push her around?
Do you feel better now as she falls to the ground?
Well I'll tell you my friend, one day this world's going to end
as your lies crumble down, a new life she has found.

Face down in the dirt, she said,
"This doesn't hurt", she said,
"I finally had enough."
[x2]

One day she will tell you that she has had enough
it's coming round again.

Do you feel like a man when you push her around?
Do you feel better now as she falls to the ground?
Well I'll tell you my friend, one day this world's going to end
as your lies crumble down, a new life she has found.
[x2]

Face down in the dirt, she said,
"This doesn't hurt", she said,
"I finally had enough."

BIG BIG THANKS TO THE CHEERUPS.. cupcake i'm missing you.

today. everything will just be so freaking plain. heard of the car and oil metaphor? well, its like this. imagine, oil represents encouragement&care while the car represents me. u, my special someone, is inside the car which is the shape of a freaking heart. car depends on oil to continue running. without it, the car will die off or worst still, break down. so when the person inside the heart car constantly gives oil the car, the car will run forever effectively and will not breakdown. it is able to run down any obstacles in the way. the whole metaphor expresses what a relationship should be. imagine, if the person in the car is sad, he/she will not deposit oil to the car. therefore both is affected. a relationship should always be a two-way thing. equal in giving in and equal in taking. all this was freaking thought by me when i was freaking EMo.

everything is affecting me. studies, family. i hate it. when i say that u don't care, it doesn't mean that it has affected my feelings for you. it simply means put some oil in me. yet, i can't freaking believe it that u agreed not to care for me. i'm so freaking hurt. it's not your fault. maybe u are different, in the way u show u love me. or maybe i'm just a freaking loser who asks for too much. thinking about this, when did i ever ask u for anything. all i wanted was the best for u. don't worry. this stupid obstacle has not affected my love for u one bit.

sacrifices. such a strong word. everyone makes sacrifices. may it be big or small. its just that this is the first ever time i'm putting so much sacrifices into a relationship. yet, i'm happy putting all efforts on u. all i need is just some freaking OIL. i know u put sacrifices too. thank you for that. sorry, but i can'thelp thinking that me, the one taking o' level has time for u and u, not taking o' level has no time for us. should it be the freaking other way round. i'm suffering. someone, put a bullet through my head, thank you. one thing that has caused me to feel relief today is that i have finished FNN coursework B. finally. for your information, i got 1918 for SBQ history today, havent gotten back SEQ. she cancelled one mark for me. for arrogance? she said. well its fine. leaving the blog freaking emo again. remember, none of this, and will never be, has affected my love for you. MAHAL KITA.


Phrase of the Day: Encouragement and Care keeps a relationship going.



no random pictures today. no mood to search, sorry. instead, i'll try u guys to a song lyrics. Enjoy.



"If I Fall"

This is for the ones who believe their lives won't change
Hoping that someday things will mend and be the same
This is for the ones who have lost it all when all that's left to gain
Is a simple reminder that the things that were blind to slip away...

How can I say...
Say I'll be okay...

And if I fall through these days that go by without cause
Just a painful mistake has left me here on my own
And if I fall through these nights I can't seem to go on
Just a sign that you're with me gives me the strength to hold on

Now that the lines been broken
I'm too afraid to just look back
The pages have left an empty space
You were all I had
Why does it have to be this way
These things they'll never change
Still I'm left with knowing, content and happy, this is all I need...

And if I fall through these days that go by without cause
Just a painful mistake has left me here on my own
And if I fall through these nights I can't seem to go on
Just a sign that you're with me gives me the strength to hold on

And if I fall through these days that go by without cause
Just a painful mistake has left me here on my own
And if I fall through these nights I can't seem to go on
Just a sign that you're with me gives me the strength to hold on...

well guys, what are 'emo's? well, they are people who are emotional i guess. those who feel that the world and everyone hates them, those who don't treasure themselves? i guess that's just the way how some people feel. hmmm today is such an EMO day. so many people are emo! are emo's taking over the world?? ask yourself that and reflect!

even i am starting to be an emo. i just can't belive it that i felt sad getting a 32 mark in SS which was the highest in the level? well, this is a blog, and no, im not bragging. i felt sad maybe cause i got higher than my friends and felt bad for them. i just feel bad when my friends don't do well and their faces of disappointment saddens me.

the day started with a dark dark sky. hmmm am i dumb or what, it was 6am of course the sky was dark LOL. i had a totally nice hairstyle today, i guess everyday is good hair day. LOL. hmmm it was drizzling again as usual. amazingly yet again, i keep seeing ur face in puddles of water, this made me realise how much i missed and loved you. then, as usual, had a boring maths lesson, and had o' level FNN practical for coursework B which went awfully well. me and nicol cooked the excess chicken in soy sauce which tastes unexpectedely nice. LOL!

as we collected the SS results, everyone was so disappointed including me. after that, there was so many emo people. even my bestie aznita. LOL, she hasn't told me her problem but i can sense she does have a problem. something nasty happened, nigel took my seat and refused to give it back to me. he kept giving me the sarcastic face eventhough i told him to give it back to me nicely. i counted to five, still he refused and even counted along. i gave him a hard blow on the shoulder which made him return the seat to me. actually, i didnt regret it but i felt bad. after that, was EMO EMO EMO the whole day. after school, me, nicol, haziq, bingyuan, charmaine, sheilina and z-man was waiting and listening around to ms lim talk. while waiting, we talked and demostrated about fighting. lol, we even arm restled. i'm not gonna tell u who was victorious. its very obvious. LOL! ;D


went home with junkai. we watched people play soccer at the voiddeck for a while then continued to walk home. today cupcake smsed me unusually less which made me feel that there was something wrong with her. yet again, emo. but she didnthave a problem afterall. so foolish of me. LOL. and there's this girl bothering cupcake. her name is winnie. ahhhh her mouth just doesnt suit her name. she's filled with freaking rubbish and freaking crap. if u have nothing better to say, just freaking shutup and learn some manners, stop bothering us or else. emo once again. leaving the blog pissed off.
btw, WINNIE SUCKS.


PHRASE of the Day: 'EMO' is spreading, like a virus.






RANDOM PICTS AGAIN

As usual, i would have the monday blues. Which is to me, either BEING emo or just SLEEPY. Well, for this particular monday, can u guess which one i felt? LOL. As usual, i know you guessed wrongly. LOL. i was just SLEEPY! The day started awfully well, woke up at 6am, then heated up my food and then bathed and got dressed up. Spent about 10minutes as usual on the HAIR. ahhaha.

As i was walking to school, it started drizzling, and it felt so freaking cold. There were small puddles of water where i kept seeing your face. 'hallucinations' i believe? I reached school at about 7:20am as usual. On the way maybe i yawned a few hundred times. In class, we kept on joking about each others' special someone, then this IDIOT junkai placed his hand in my pocket and tore the whole pocket. LOL. it fine with me i guess, cause it can always be stitched ;D

ENJOYEDhistory lesson as ms ong wasn't around and there wasn't even a relief teacher around. Talked to my bestie Aznita a lot today about my special someone. Omg, that smart allec____ bragged about his knowledge on HARRY POTTER which made me switch tables and talk to someone else instead. it is so pissing everyone off man, CHANGE! that's what you need to do. After that, during maths lesson, junkai, me and nicol continued our conversation about various random stuff that we always talk about. We got scolded by ms yong blah blah blah. Went to recess and ate TAJ CUISINE. during recess too, we went to the library and saw a bunch of sec 3 guys looking at PORN. LOL.

I FAILED CHEM PAPER 2. this was such a stunner, i had confidence that i would at least pass it, i studied for this paper and i'm so disappointed in myself ;( i'll do better in prelim 2, i promise! This made me more motivated to do well next time, and also THANKS for cheering me up. AHH! ;D Physics was unusually fun, we checked our paper which i passed, and talked about what makes a person successful. LOL. Anyways, what he said was kinda true. Clever people are useless without hardwork and the right attitude. then, he talked about clowns and elephants? HEHEHHE!

That's all folks! i'm off to meet cupcakes ;D

PHRASE of the DAY: Clever people are useless without hardwork and the right attitude.

i'm not cheating on you.i hope you trust me. ;(




Random pictures yet again ;D

hey hey hey people! This is my VERY first post! I guess they say that there's a first time to everything, well this is the first time i'm having a blog ;D cool ain't it? well, today i had really 'great time' doing FNN coursework which i have not yet finished. 4 more PAGES! waaaaa i'm going to die of tired-ness. LOL. HAHAHA. Now, i'm off to do SS homework, which me and aznita agreed upon to do one each. hahaha that's so freaking manipulative!

Hehehe! i'm missing you so much, hahah especially, when you are off to somewhere far like SENTOSA and not being able to sms a lot, make me miss you. LOL, like what they say, absence makes the heart grow fonder!
below are some try-out random pictures! oh btw, i have to give credit to AZNITA for helping me out with this freaking-ly difficult-to-do blog. THANK YOU bestie! ;D


Phrase of the Day: Absence makes the heart grow fonder.