tonight make things right.
pray,
weep,
happy.

btw,
my computer still spoilt lol.
sorry!

"Grasshoppers"

sitting on my rooftop,
i screamed my lungs out.
heart-breakingly today,
settling some problems that i've had.

it wasn't easy at all,
making the absence of dawn,
my motivation,
my strenghth,
my will,
indeed i will perservere.

returning would be like a long-awaited feast,
a celebration,
just like to in-loved grasshoppers,
meeting after winter.
reunion.

febuary7th.08.


guys,
my inside computer spoiled!
so i won't really be online much at night cause
dad's at home and the only com i could use
is the outside one.
yeah,
so give me a holler,
when u need anything,
important or not,
call(:

my appeal wasn't successful,
oh well.
tomorrow the last shot.
pray.

"Part II"

i couldn't sleep,
after that abomination i've created.
that awful,
yet dreadful decision i made.

it was inevitable.
i had to do it,
to protect you.
i've never lost love for you.

but why?
i had to settle it on my own,
i'm sellfish,
i'm selfless,
just like a landlord collecting money from the poor.

feb4.



today super boring.
give me a job soon.
yeah,
if only you knew that,
everysingleday,
i wrote something,
a poem?
a random set of words,
from the heart.

thanks az for uploading the song,
right now,
thats the song that describes every emotion in my body.
listen to the lyrics.
right now,
i'll just go away,
as far as possible,
till someone comes looking for me.

from now on,
i'll start sharing my poems and thoughts here.

"Everytime"

..and so it begins

everytime i look into your eyes,
all i can see are glares of misconception.

everytime i look back,
guilt rushes through my veins like a vacuum.

everytime i think about how we used to be,
vivid premonitions of the future appears.

everytime i crave for you touch,
i'd put a knife through my hand,
knowing that the cause of all that was my doing.

everytime i'm given a choice,
your happiness is all i think about.

what should i do?
let you go?
or rather, let you go into the blues alone?
through the monsoon without me?
will you miss me?

and so it ends..


"Time"

looking out my window,
time moves past me,
like a leaf in the wind.

right before my eyes,
leaves wither,
green leaves turn orange,
and eventually brown.

am i feeling miserable?
is it just another misconception?
no.
i'm just stupid.

Pictures of today coming up.
It's not for the weak-hearted,
introducing..
D's sister!
ZANN! lol.

[c=7]·$#FF8D1C--*яacнει*-- ·$#FF0000<3 thailand ·$#FF8000-·&if only we were all back in thailand.....[/c] says:
really wisht he best for u 2
[c=7]·$#FF8D1C--*яacнει*-- ·$#FF0000<3 thailand ·$#FF8000-·&if only we were all back in thailand.....[/c] says:
haha
[c=7]·$#FF8D1C--*яacнει*-- ·$#FF0000<3 thailand ·$#FF8000-·&if only we were all back in thailand.....[/c] says:
n not other ppl whom i know off
PETER. if only ---- could see what i just said sigh. says:
haha. if i got one thing to tell her. i'd say.
PETER. if only ---- could see what i just said sigh. says:
'from now on, i'll never put a fullstop on everything i tell you, cause i never want it to end'
PETER. if only ---- could see what i just said sigh. says:
'our lovestory will never have a fullstop'
PETER. if only ---- could see what i just said sigh. says:
thanks for the support rach
[c=7]·$#FF8D1C--*яacнει*-- ·$#FF0000<3 thailand ·$#FF8000-·&if only we were all back in thailand.....[/c] says:
if only she could see this
PETER. wishing ever story wouldn't have a fullstop says:
let her see this.
PETER. wishing ever story wouldn't have a fullstop says:
through your eyes.
[c=7]·$#FF8D1C--*яacнει*-- ·$#FF0000<3 thailand ·$#FF8000-·&if only we were all back in thailand.....[/c] says:
i hope she understands
[c=7]·$#FF8D1C--*яacнει*-- ·$#FF0000<3 thailand ·$#FF8000-·&if only we were all back in thailand.....[/c] says:
as u know...
[c=7]·$#FF8D1C--*яacнει*-- ·$#FF0000<3 thailand ·$#FF8000-·&if only we were all back in thailand.....[/c] says:
it takes 2 hands to clap
PETER. wishing ever story wouldn't have a fullstop says:
sigh. i hope she does):
[c=7]·$#FF8D1C--*яacнει*-- ·$#FF0000<3 thailand ·$#FF8000-·&if only we were all back in thailand.....[/c] says:
yep
[c=7]·$#FF8D1C--*яacнει*-- ·$#FF0000<3 thailand ·$#FF8000-·&if only we were all back in thailand.....[/c] says:
stop sighing la

the all-mighty smart rachel says this. lol, last night 12am.

Today i'm talking about HOPE.

Hope usually is something good.
But it sucks. Seriously, when you come to think of it.
Especially when you are at the other end.
There are pros and cons.
Ever heard of coma survivals?
Usually, the coma patients can only rely solely on HOPE?
They rely on the hope to live?
If they themselves have to hope to live, they wouldnt.
It sucks when you give others hope.
Especially, when someone likes you, eventhough u don't like that person,
you give him the feeling that you like him too.
Eventhough u don't like the guy, you get close to him.
Seriously that sucks,
one of the worst things a girl can do to a guy,
guys do you agree?
But then vice versa, guys doing that to girls is..
Rather Rare.
Cause girls shouldn't chase guys,
or else they'll be despos.
Anyways,
I hope everyone learnt a lesson here in this post,
girls don't give guys HOPE,
cause when they are sooo into you,
and they think they have a chance,
and in the end you reject,
they'll be heart broken.
Girls, don't get too much attention cause your heads are gonna be BIGGER!
And guys, never attract unwanted attention,
cause you'll be breaking hearts the next move.
Unless you are really interested//

d, as for you.
i can't say much,
i really want to turn back time.
listen to your friends,
when they say something.
cause they tell me those too,
and i can't tell you,
cause i can't do anything.
i really hope i can change everything back to what it was.
i really hope so. MKD.

today was awesome.
i woke up at 12. lol imagine 9 hours of sleep, finally. lol! then i ate lunch straight after i had awoken from my slumber. LOL huh? haha, as usual, my aunt lea was there. i mean every sunday without fail she comes by. lol, we were as usual talking about BRENDA. lol, inside joke u see. hahaha. then while i was eating, i reviewed my brother in his English cause tomorrow is his exams u see. So i really hope he can do well, lol. I mean the standard at De Lasalle Primary is very high, it is a respectable school anyways. After that, i bathed, going to PS.

lol, told my dad that d wanted to come cck, then he said 'Tell her come eat lunch'. I was effing surprised lol. My mom was laughing, saying 'your dad is having period'. lol i was happy though. lol, then when i got ready, i went off meeting D at tiong. lol, she was so effing early la, sorry! Then we were happy seeing each other after so long, lol and then went to our destination. PS. Hahaha, such fun. lol, we talked about loads of stuff, she updated me on her life and i told her about my awesome new friends in LPCC. lol, told her about lionel and how a lot of things of ours were similiar, like our o' level pts, the anime we watch, the games we play, lol. So yeah i told her we clicked together, and told her LIONEL was gay.

At PS. We bought the tickets to seee 'Ah Long PTE LTD'. LOL, then we went to Kopitiam to eat. Lol, then we went to Carrefour to buy drinks. Lol, i intro d to lyn and vans. and uhh, shant elaborate. We proceeded to the theatres, the movie rocked. lol, so funny, i mean for a local show, it was nice. finally, some decent singapore movies. lol. The theatres was full house! lol, i totally enjoyed, thanks!(:

so yeah, then went to d's home. i missed her family! lol, especially her parents and siblings! lol, zann was like, 'kor kor peter! See super mario...' lol! and charles was asking all about tribalwars and other stuff. Uncle Dan was soo hilarious showing us all the funny videos there was in youtube about the floating people lol! and we learned the secrets of how to float on air lol! Then we watched Achmed the Terrorist and Jingle Bombs, lol zann was. OMG non-stop laughing! haha, Aunt Michelle cooked pizza for us! Thanks, then i went home at around 9-10pm. The day was a blast. Thanks for making it happen, D! MKD. =P

haha,
had an okie day at CCK library with the duo li and vi.
lol.
my friends are awesome. lol!
after that,
we went to limband park to...
do our hobby #18796++
lol.
sitting around doing nothing.
no plans tomorrow,
see what the wind blows towards me..

TRANSFORMERS! - baby, come back! (:

KELLY RECRUITING SERVICES SUCKS! They tore out application paper! LOL! Their job sucks anyways, lol. Recruit Express better. lol! Fuck still no job, haha so no job, we went to watch movie, pool and stuff. lol! Here are the pictures today.(:

p.s,
i love my FRIENDS!(:

btw,
all of them picts are CUTEEEEEEEE!

yesterday was one of the worst day/night ever.
shant elaborate.
it sucks.
ohh well.
tomorrow morning soccer,
yippee.
hope i wake up on time.
bye.

update when i have mood.
ate this yesterday lol.
to cheermyself up.

- hot! i mean the weather! =P

- 'haha, noooo you can't reach me!'

- 'my sister ain't a PIG!'

- 'you farted! not me!'

- kids having fun.

- i wonder what these crazy kids are doing..

- i love them mann, can't ever think of living without em.

- mom's so beautiful(:

ohhh well, today is such a hot day. i mean, everyday is a hot day. LOL.
i woke up at exactly 10:50am to a ringing phone, guess who? hahaha,
then, i proceeded and helped my mother and cleaned the house! lol,
if only i could take a 'before' and 'after picture or the house, i'm sure
you guys will be amazed. i scrubbed the carpet HARD, cause of a certain LION,
dropping and messing up the carpet with cake and pepsi yesterday. lol, it's
totally fine with me, cause look on the brightside, it makes my muscles grow,
cleaning and all! oooops! i forgot. before i continue with what happened today,
let's talk about yesterday!

YESTERDAY (flashback). LOL.
I woke up at 10am, started calling the LPCC peeps to make sure they know what
time to meet and all. lol, as usual, i was early at the CCK mrt station at 1250pm.
i saw a lot of old friends like Sadli, and a lot of other girls in lot one.
lol, i didnt bother to say 'hi' and all cause i was talking on the phone.
ohhh yeah, edward was there too, he loooked sooo FORMAL hahah, chatted with him
about work till weixiang and anson came. and the exact time of 1:56pm,
yusri, lyn and vanessa arrived at CCK mrt station. lol, as i had anticipated,
they'd come late. oh well. lol. then, unusually, LIONEL was the one late coming at
2:05. lol, weird cause he is usually the one early. after meeting, we headed to NTUC just to buy ICECREAM! weeeee! then we headed to my place. mom, as friendly as always welcomed them and we started baking. hahaha, we had a blast. lol, some people dunno
how to use the beater lol. then we made our chocolate milkshake with strawberries
and icing and stuff. OMG it was heartmelting. the taste was awesome! we took pictures
with the shake which i would upload as soon as i get the motivation to do so!
then after that we proceed-ed to my wonderfully furnished and awesome living room.
LOL! we watched 'An American Haunting' which nobody understood. LOL. LIONEL was like,
OMG GAY?? hahhaha he was as scared as a cat. 'scaredy cat'? HAHA! then after that,
we moved on to the oh so classic movie, 'The Wizard of OZ'. after thirty minutes
into the movie, yuz and lyn went away. leaving, me and vanessa and lionel watching.
we looked at my photo albums while watching the movie, they were laughing at how
hawt i was and right now LOL!!!!! hahaha, then my mom asked them to spot where she
was in the photo album and even showed them their wedding photos before. LOL.
after that we went to my room, to use the computer and watched youtube. lol,
soooo many funny videos! then after that my mom, unpresidently invited them to...
DINNER. OMG first time. lol. they ate and went home, and I GOT MYPAY FINALLY!(:

today, going to church then after that im treating my family to coffee cartel?
HAHA, awesome, anyone wanna come, go to bp plaza at around 8pm, see u there!(:


take care and you guys are loved!(:

first and foremost,
HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!(:

to all lovers,
may you guys continue loving each other,
with all your heart,
mind,
and soul!
to all friends,
continue your understanding,
and loving each other,
while at the same time,
looking out one another,
hoping that the saying 'friends forever' comes true!

Today,
was an OKIE day.
hahahha I WOKE UP LATEEEEEEE!):
hahhaha yesterday,
me and mom baked brownies and cookies,
but,
unfortunately,
my cookies were tooooo awesome,
before i got to it,
it was finished.
so,
i hurried and salvaged my brownies!
hahaha,
then gave them to vans, lyn and lionel!
lol,
i have yet to hear their comments!

beforehand,
i met vans and we exchanged presents,
lol.
awesome card!
thanks sooo much!(:

then we met lyn and lionel (thecouple),
and headed to Plaza Singapure Carrefour,
to buy the baking stuff we using for tomorrow,
at my house!
hahaha we posponed valentine's day to tomorrow!
everyone is welcome!

YUZ,
if u dun come,
I WON'T TALK TO YOU! HMPH!

Here are the photos we took today(:


- Lionel, Vanessa and me! (all carrefour and ex-carrefour workers!)

- omg, so act cute.

- Vanessa! (lack of sleep!) btw, my hair sooo howt! haha kidding!

- the TALL peeps! Lionel & ME.

- the Cutieee Lyn(:

- LPCC without the stupid YUSRI.

- pretty ladies!

enjoy peeeps!(:

Today was awesome!
We went to Yusri's house to..
COOK! LOL!
We liked ahd so much fun cooking! (boys i mean).
Lol, Vanessa and Lyn was like super 'helpful!' ahhaha kidding!
at least they set up the table.
We cooked,
fruit salad,
macaroni and spaghetti,
prego cheese and herbs,
trditional sauce,
HER HIGHNESS 'chicken'.
and lionel's specialty,
SKINLESS NUGGETS!
LOL!

After eating the 'awesome' own cooked meal,
lol we watched a super lame movie,
the office! ahhaa,
it was like..
errr..
'nice'.

then after that,
we walked around,
till like,
10pm then i sent vans home(:

end of story. LOL. can't wait friday!

first and foremost,
thanks DAWN, bestie!
for the wonderful tigger you gave to me along with my watch.
it's sooo nice for u to drop by my house and place it there.
thanks.

okie, so yesterday (sunday)
we went church. HAHAHAHA.
then after that went to eat at lot one,
the foodcourt below.
What the hell.
i bought Sambal Fried Rice,
with an Extra Chicken.
THEN THEY CHARGED ME $3.20 FOR THE FREAKING CHICKEN!
OMG LIKE CHEAT SMALL CHILDREN MONEY.
I WAS SOOO ANGRY!
then they say cannot cancel cause they cut and heat it already,
lol i ask my mom go talk,
also no use,
bloody cheaters!
EVERYONE,
DUN EVER BUY FROM THE ROTI PRATA STALL AT BASEMENT FOODCOURT LOT ONE!



okie,
i'm going out now, to go meet,
lion,lyn,yuz,vans.
we gonna buy the ingredient that we gonna cook tomorrow!
can't wait.
bye guys!
you are loved. (:

HAHAHAHA,
i MAY wanna continue blogging?
cause sooomeee people keeps persuading me to blog, update and such,
LOL,
in other words,
it's because of popular demand!
HAHAHA,
anyways,
ummmm today i woke up like around 9am,
cause there was a *crook x5 coming from my phone,
lol,
ALARM (;
hahaha,
i met lyn and vans and her mom at jurong mrt,
lol,
followed them to work.
CARREFOUR - someplace awesomeee! *cough*
then after that went to fort canning park to ummmm,
errrr observe the wonderful nature,
it was like so awesome,
i mean everything was soo nice,
the view, the butterflies and the coulours of the plants,
i was seeing GREEN! my fave colour!
lol!
then i was like mentioning over and over again about that
AWESOME purple sunset i saw like 2 yrs ago?
i wanna see again,
sigh!
then after that left dhoby ghaut at around 3,
met my family at woodlands to like HOPEFULLY collect my serviced n80!
tooooo bad!
NOKIA was close );
sooooooo we like walked around,
they looked for microwave ovens,
and i bought my little brother a nintendo DS.
LOL, a staggerring 350 bucks!
OMG,
cause he wanted the cartridge and casing and protector with it,
so lol,
since im soooo NICE,
yeh i bought for him,
BURNT a hole in my pocket.
buying simple plan CD sooooon! (:


tomorrow, there's no plan yet,
but i'll think of something!
cant wait monday and tuesday! (:


TO MY BELOVED AZNITAAAAAAA! :
THANK YOU x10000000000000000 soooo much for helping me restore and make my blog awesome, lol *she's the invader below!
LOL i love u laaaa bestie! Ummmmmm, torture u again some other time!

Feel free to comment on the new skin and songs!
**** highly recommended, listen to the lyrics of the second song! (:***

Hey, please do leave your name and link if you want to be link in the blog. coz some idiot (which is me, the invader. lol!) have accidentally pressed the wrong button which make all links gone! Luckily, I retrieve some. IF NOT I DIE!! haha!!!!!

much love,
invader :)

Wouldn't be using this blog anymore I THINK.
decisions suck,
especially when you have to make one thats super hard.
i hate it.
i'm tired.
real tired.

I'm reorganising my life,
people, friends, family,
please be a part of this.
i want myself to become a better person,
thanks for all the support and comfort you guys have given me,
i know i can depend on you guys.
most of the time,
i'll be alone,
but at times,
spend time with me,
cause i need you guys.
thanks.
wait.
sadly,
goodbye.